Of Rising Stars: Ashley has just turned 4 and is a panda at Stoneway pre-school. When not issuing orders to John & Patrice, she stays busy with classes in gymnastics (practicing on any bouncy piece of furniture) and ballet. She has just had her first ballet recital to rave reviews. Ashley now prints her name. She has also taken up astronomy and has received instruction from the preeminent Astro-Physicist, Dr. Laurence Taff (Patrice's former boss at Lincoln Laboratory). Ashley informed us recently that Jupiter is the largest planet and the farthest planet is Goofy.

Travel Log: The Randalls ventured out to the west coast this spring the old fashioned way, by train. There they invaded the Wooleys' house and generally wreaked havoc. The carefully planned (to avoid crowds) mid-week trip to Disney Land overlooked the small detail of spring break. Ashley's much anticipated meeting with Mickey Mouse made everything alright. John spent two weeks this fall on the other side of the Atlantic in Holland where he learned how to play with an E-Beam Machine (an expensive toy that TI is buying). On their way there, John & Mad-Brad passed through London where they were going to stop by and visit the Queen, but got lost in the Theater district.

Interior Decorating: As promised last year, Patrice has found the perfect chairs (Chippendale) to go with our dining room table which is a glass top on plaster columns. We now have the only New-wave Anglo-Corinthian dining room on the block.

FUZZY FELINE FOLLYS: Isis, the family furball, has continued her nightly assault on Patrice's sleep patterns, gets plenty of exercise running from Ashley and John, and has decided to fertilize, on a regular basis, the cane plant in the living room.

Trivia question : for our Massachusetts friends: How many Harvard graduates does it take to screw in a light bulb? The next page has answer.

Answer: One. He holds the bulb and the World turns around him.

Relativity Report: The Stepchinski Story - Anita and Eddie (Patty Rice Cake's Parents) are living in leisure at their lake house in Conroe while their new house is being built in Houston. Patrice's little (225 lbs. and still growing) brother Nigel is now a lieutenant with the Houston Police Dept. when he is not pumping iron. His live-in love-slave (wife) Rhonda is now a sergeant with HPD. But the BIG NEWS is that older brother Patrick is engaged (so sad ladies). He is happily betrothed to Erica whom the Randalls find delightful.

The Randall Roundup - Bill & Vee (the people who got John from an Indian Reservation) have moved again. They now reside close to the Finch Funny Bunch. The FFB consist of Cindy (John's sister), Bob (her Hubby), Shelly (Ashley's cousin), with occasional appearances by Sunnye & Brett. The cast of characters is about to expand since Cindy is expanding. But the BIG NEWS on the Randalls' side concerns John's brother Mike and his bride Vicki. They were married in a stunning lakeside ceremony early this year and then wasted no time in expanding their roll call. Cally Juline Randall was born Dec. 10. Mother, daughter, and father (way to go Mike!) are all doing fine.

TI STOCK REPORT: The Advanced Concepts crew has done it again! This year, the latest and greatest quantum effect device is a Bipolar Quantum Resonant Tunneling Transistor or BiQuaRTT (John calls it a Half-Gallon). This little technological marvel was written up in the WALL STREET JOURNAL and was described by a local paper as being something like a double sided elevator in the Leaning Tower of Pisa (think about it). Its first technologically important application will be to cause wailing and gnashing of teeth at Bell Labs. In an effort to keep John as busy as possible (so he will stay out trouble), TI has purchased a state-of-the-art E-Beam Lithography machine. In an effort to keep themselves as busy as possible Chia-Hung and Ming-Jey Yang have added Julia (a baby girl) to their family. Elaine Pijan continues to put up with John and supplies him with dirty jokes.

Patrice's Showbiz Career: Gadzooks and Goshallmighty! Patrice has been rubbing elbows with the stars! So far she has been in a Fiat commercial (shown only in Europe), an EDS stockholder (on video), in an HBO movie (Dead Solid Perfect), and in two episodes of DALLAS (no foolin). Those of you who missed these exciting events should not worry. We fully expect to capture every second of her glory on video tape and will be more than happy to share all 47 of them with you. In spite of lavish praise from the critics (John & Ashley), Patrice reports that she has had enough of showbiz and will concentrate on Babybiz in 89.

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